Mommy is here...
I still can’t believe that my body aided in a miracle. My body created something as complex as a human being. Three times. That I had even the smallest part in their creation leaves me in awe. My last pregnancy was nearly twelve years ago, and sometimes I miss being pregnant. There was a certain comfort in that mother child connection.
But I was pregnant I couldn’t wait for them to be born. I felt that small life stirring inside of me and instead of stopping to savor the moment all I wanted to do was hurry the process along so that I hold them. I wanted it over, I wanted it done.
I tried to enjoy their childhoods, I really did. To slow down and watch them grow. But it was all so exciting. Each one of their firsts was a family celebration. Their first diaper. Their first smile. The first time they lifted their head. Rolled over. The first tooth. Crawling. I could hardly wait. Then it finally came, their first step.
From that first step on, make no mistake, they are walking away from you.
The old parents kept telling me to stop and enjoy it, and I honestly thought I was. I thought that I was taking the time to store each moment inside of me so that I could have them forever, but somewhere in between then and now, my children were slowly replaced with adults.
We are always trying to find ways to preserve their childhoods in our minds. Photographs and bronze baby shoes. Try to hold on to a moment forever. Height marks upon the doorjamb and field day ribbons. Keep it close to our hearts. Driver’s licenses and dried corsages. Almost time for them to go.
Now, I am watching them walk away and thanking the Lord I didn’t know how painful a single step could someday be. They really are growing up way to damn fast. Those not so old people were right. It happened in the blink of an eye. *Poof* grown.
Bye Mom!
(My youngest daughter is turning twelve today. Growing up so fast... :) Love you with all my heart Nay!)
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